New year, new bleurgh

Well Christmas was really great - I had a fantastic time and ate and drank and socialised like there was no tomorrow. I bought some nice clothes in the xmas sales which make me feel a little more smartly dressed than usual. Graham and I went out for drinks and food quite a bit and for once I had enough money not to worry about having enough money to do things.

However, my general mood since 27th December has been pretty grim. The tsunami has really effected me in so much as I just walk around in a vague depression all the time. Graham's granddad also died that day so that was another downer. There seems to be no good news at the moment apart from how charitable everyone is being - it just seems to be mass death, murder, paranoia and destruction in the papers at the moment and it just makes me SIGH all the time.

Coming back to work was a shocker this week - I just can't handle the boredom any more and it is starting to make me angry now as well as apathetic. I think I might have to find myself a new job after all before we move to Canada.

I have much to look forward to in 2005 - Graham's 30th birthday and accompanying holiday, Dad's 65th, my birthday break, holiday to Canada in the summer, our Canadian application's anniversary, trips to Devon and Cornwall planned (in my head anyway) , good films and theatre events, but I can't shake the feeling of doom I've got enough to enjoy planning for any of it.

Sigh. I still can't quite get my head around the scale of death, destruction and grief caused by that tsunami. I don't expect I ever will. Maybe I shouldn't have to comprehend it, but it's part of my nature to try and understand what all these people are going through, to try and put myself in their situation.

We had a rather sedate New Year. It was nice, just sedate. Just the 4 of us up north burning things on a BBQ and setting fireworks off that made the car alarm across the road go off with every boom, and sent next door's dog absolutely loopy. We jumped around a bit at midnight as you do, but I wasn't feeling drunk or particularly celebratory. I did try though, honest.

Hopefully next time I'm on here I'll be a bit chirpier...