Oh! Inverted World

The lyrics to a particular Shins song keep going through my head today. I can’t complain really as they’re good lyrics and it’s a good tune, but it worries me how much I have a one-track mind.

“unknown quotients, you must be using potions how else could you tie my head to the sky this new convection has left me wondering why I can't concern myself with ordinary tripe. like what's this morning's paper got to say and which brand of coffee to make this is no umbrella to take into the wind and before we begin is there nothing to kill this anxiety.”

For the past couple of weeks or so some students at work have been really getting on my nerves. They just won’t shut up, and insist on eating and drinking and making a mess. They act like school kids half of them and I think it’s about time they grew up. We’ve been getting all strict with them, confiscating food and drink, making them turn their phones off mid conversation, having a go at them if they rush out of the library shouting “Hello? Yeah I’m in the library!” (so Dom Joly but they really do do it) and when it all came to a head last Friday and I got fed up of their cheekiness I started taking names for my new offenders list.

It’s just so annoying that we have to do all this in the first place. We used to like having a relaxed attitude towards our students, it helped having a friendly relationship with them, but more and more I’ve just got so wound up with them, and it makes me hate my job even more. I’m not in it for the stress.

There’s a Costco wholesale supermarket opening up in Avonmouth in May and I’m seriously tempted to go for a job there. I don’t know why I keep talking about it rather than just sending in my CV – I think I’m scared of big change coming before the BIG change of country, but I do nothing but moan about my current job so I should just shut up or start seriously looking. Costco has got a really good rep in US and Canada, they’re a good company to work for – they look out for their employees and their staff are known to be very professional and knowledgeable, but the main reason why I am considering this is because our apartment in Vancouver is being built over a Costco, and if I get myself a job with Costco here then it should be fairly easy to walk straight into a job over there. And let’s face it, a job is not going to be easy to get in Vancouver when we first get there, and I need to start earning money as soon as possible.

I bought the Garden State DVD off ebay last week and was really gutted to find that none of the special features were working. Graham thought I was stupid asking if I could send it back and get a refund or replacement, but it was advertised as new and sealed and with a film like Garden State that I’m really really into, the special features are sometimes more important than the film itself. I mean I want to hear the director’s commentary, and see all the deleted scenes and bloopers, because as well as loving the film, I really love Zach Braff! Anyway, I’ve been told I can send it back and get a full refund so that’s what I’ll be doing. The film is coming out on Region 2 in May so I think I’m just going to wait till then, to avoid a repeat of what has just happened.

Had a fairly nice weekend. Went out to Hullabaloos on Friday for their 2 courses for £7 before 7pm and it was surprisingly good although we ended up spending £12 each and that was without wine as it was BYO. We also went out to dinner on Saturday with less success – Henry J Bean’s were doing an offer whereby you buy 2 main meals and get a free bottle of pinot grigio. The wine was very nice but unfortunately the food was on the greasy side and Graham’s was well overdone as well. We didn’t feel much like drinking after that and only made one pint before going home to watch Comic Aid. Which probably was for the best as I really enjoyed the show and got to see my second second boyfriend Simon Pegg (my first second boyfriend being Zach Braff).

My first boyfriend (the real one, rather than the imaginary one) is a bit down in the dumps at the moment. His plans for his birthday party on Saturday have gone pretty much down the pan. All he wanted was a relaxed afternoon with all his friends before going out for a nice meal. First of all his brother said he was going to Hereford to see their mum so would be late, then Jon split up with Stef, and now Hing Yu reckons he needs to make up numbers so is intending on inviting some of his friends that no one else knows. So Graham has got all grumpy and decided not to bother inviting everyone round to the house first and just to go for a bog standard meal in town instead.

He is also very depressed about work right now. He can’t stand working with Keith day in day out and sooner or later he’s going to snap. It wouldn’t surprise me if he was in a new job by the end of the year but it seems a great shame for him to have to leave because of someone else’s incompetence. Especially as he was hoping to get a career break to go to Canada, and no new company is going to allow him to do that.

...and in conclusion the point is that there is no point...

It's been so long that I've posted on here that I forgot what my password was for a moment. A few failed attempts later and here I am...

Maybe I was right to have a sense of doom about January - Graham almost didn't make his 30th birthday. We went out with a few of his mates from work to celebrate Kirsty's birthday and because her usual Wetherspoons haunt was closed for redecoration we went to Lloyds number 1 down by the docks instead. We had a fairly fun night getting stupidly drunk then went on to a club for a little bit and it was when we left there that it all happened. I was still in the club getting my coat from the cloakroom and the rest were outside waiting for me. When I got out I was told that Graham and Rich had fallen in the water and hadn't yet come up for air.

It turned out he was sitting on the railings at the edge of the dock, and Rich, who he'd been messing around with playfighting earlier, came up behind him and yanked him jokingly. Graham lost his balance and tumbled into the water, taking Rich with him and cracking his head on the wall on the way down. Graham still doesn' t remember anything about the incident, just that one minute he was sat on the railings, the next he was wondering why he was breathing water and not knowing which way was up. We think he must have knocked himself out with the fall but the coldness of the water revived him thankfully.

After a lot of screaming and tears on my part and panic on Graham's part, Graham and Rich eventually emerged from the water and managed to find a ladder to climb back up. Then we took them to A&E to see whether they needed some jabs because of the dirty water and the doctors had a look at Graham's head but discharged him with a head injuries leaflet and a warning not to be left alone for 48 hours.

Unfortunately I was still absolutely blind drunk, and in my confused state I lost Graham whilst trying to find a "quicker" way home than the taxi he'd ordered. By the time I got back to where he was sitting he had long gone. But again in my confused state I didn't know whether he had got a taxi home or whether he was walking around Bristol concussed and not knowing where he was. I walked around for a bit trying to ring him on his mobile (which wasn't working as it drowned in the accident) and at home (which he wasn't answering because he couldn't hear it). I got myself all worked up and worried, realised I was very near work, so let myself in to the chemistry library as I didn't want to get a taxi on my own (I have always had a fear of that) and it wasn't safe for me to be wandering around on my own whilst so drunk. I eventually managed to get through to Graham at home, slept a couple of hours in the library until it started to get light and then made my way home.

It goes without saying that I was immensely repentent that I was so drunk that I couldn't look after my boyfriend properly when he most needed me and I will always remember the feeling of having failed him. I made up for it as best I could over the next few days. I didn't leave his side on Sunday, took the day off work to be with him on Monday, and the afternoon off to be with him on Tuesday and sent my parents to look after him on the Wednesday.

We went back to the hospital on Monday to tell them that his head had got no better but they didn't seem too concerned, just gave him some strong painkillers and told him to come back if he vomited as that may show some internal injuries. On the Tuesday he sent me to work but then rang me late morning to tell me "don't worry, but I've just been sick, and Rich was sent home from work yesterday with flu-like symptoms and they think he might have contracted Weil's disease from the dirty water." Don't worry?! Yes, OK Graham, I won't worry but get yourself down here now, and we'll get you back to the hospital sharpish. Another long wait in A&E and another doctor doing the same tests over again. Because Graham was sick they decided (finally!) to give his head a scan to check for any lasting injuries, but didn't expect to find anything. One head scan later and a sheepish looking doctor confirms what we thought all along - Graham had broken one of the little bones in the back of his head. Not that there was anything they could do to help heal it, but it was a relief to know that there was a good reason for his head not feeling any better, and that the reason wasn't due to internal bleeding or something as dangerous as that.

Graham has been off work ever since with fractured skull, concussion, whiplash and shock. This week is the start of his fourth week not at work. He's starting to feel better in himself now, and he took his first drive on Sunday but is still feeling really tired all the time and his head won't stop hurting even though it's less intense now. He's going to try and do two afternoons at work at the end of this week so he can guage whether or not he should attempt to go back full time next week. He needs to go back, he is so bored stuck at home and really irritated at still being ill. He was also really depressed that he couldn't celebrate his 30th birthday like he wanted to, but at least he got there - and we'll make up for it when he's better. He was really chuffed with his presents though - the trip to Paris and his vintage port and grand prix programme. And the special cake I had made using a caricature of him driving a McLaren - his face was a picture, I don't think I've seen him grin like that in a long time!

Hell it has been an emotional time for both of us though. We've both been prone to the odd outburst of tears over the last few weeks. We both know he is lucky to have got away with the injuries he did sustain. I mean, just the head injury is a risk enough - you hear of so many people who are out drinking and fall over, hit their head and never wake up - but with the water as well, there's no doubt about it he was so fortunate not to have drowned.

What else happened in January? Ah yes, Adrian found that he could lose his job but he won't know for sure until April, so he and Sheila had to call off their holiday with us. Graham and I will be going on our own in August. There was other bad news too, so I'm glad that month is over with and looking forward to some good news in February! Lorraine is due to have her baby anytime now so cross fingers that that all goes OK. Oh, and Paul proposed to Tracey in New Zealand so that was more good news from the antipodes!